Defining love
Let’s talk about love.
No, I’m not talking valentines and significant others - let’s define love as we will be talking about it on Joy Untainted. Because it will come up - a lot.
Many people consider joy to be found in love - in loving and being loved. Because as humans, we are relational creatures, we biologically need companionship and relationship. It’s just how we’re wired. And we see that where love is absent or lacking, everything - everything - goes wrong.
However, many people don’t really know what it looks like to be loved - truly and completely loved. We have ideas, fantasies, expectations based on the media we consume and the Instagram posts we see. But we forget that real love - regardless of whether it’s familial, romantic, or platonic - can be painfully, almost brutally vulnerable. We also forget that it’s in being vulnerable that we find the real beauty of knowing and being known.
But, I’m getting ahead of myself - what is love anyway?
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices in the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.*
Oh and we forgot one part - love never fails.**
Love is an action.
It may manifest itself in feelings, in tingles down the spine, or in a warm hug. In knowing smiles and moments of recognition. But none of those things are love.
Love is experienced, demonstrated, and present in action. In doing the inconvenient things. In setting self aside for someone else. In highest honor, in patient endurance, in protective attentiveness, in trusting forgiveness and mercy. In constant hope, persistent pursuit, consistent perseverance, unfailing provision. In full surrender.
This kind of love goes beyond chocolates and valentines. It even goes beyond significant others. This love is something that each one of us should experience and embody. Because our parents, our siblings, our children, our friends, and our classmates need this kind of love too. So many people haven’t ever been loved like this before. And sometimes, the only person they may able to feel the weight of their worth with is you. And that worth is communicated in how well we love each other.
Set the romance aside. That’s something some of us may or may not experience, and it isn’t always what we imagine it will be. But that doesn’t mean that love’s door is closed to us. In fact, it means we have the space to fully embrace and to love more completely when we recognize that love is meant to be between more than just two people - it’s supposed to be shared with the whole world. The whole world may start with your backyard, or even just in your home. But the people present in your world at this moment may need your validating presence and affection more than you could ever know.
This is the kind of love we’ll be talking about on Joy Untainted. Love that has no limits and is not constrained by imagined or constructed boundaries. Love that embraces every soul. Love that recognizes the worth of each one and validates the need we all have to love and be loved - to know and be known - by other human beings. A need that was placed in our hearts by the One that knows love deeply - in fact, He Himself is love***. And what we have to remember is that He created love to be known across time and space in every place and life. We are the ones that hold ourselves back from living, breathing, and giving this truth.
We’ll be talking a lot more about what it means to love on this blog. In fact, the next two posts explore a little more about what it means to love. Joy and love are basically second cousins (this blog could verrry easily be called Love Untainted). And now that you know how we approach love here, we can begin to apply this transformative reality to every aspect of life - yes relationships included. But that’s for another day.
Joyfully yours,
Bel
*1 Corinthians 13:4-7 NKJV
**1 Corinthians 13:8 NKJV
***1 John 4:8 NKJV
beautifully written!