On having no words.

Beldina Orinda
1 day ago
2 min read

Written reflections in the aftermath of a painful and quiet season.

As the personal grief of the last year begins to settle, I’ve realized that my words have dwindled. It’s not that I have less to say or process. If anything, I have so much more. It’s overwhelming. Disconcerting. And seemingly impossible to articulate. Suddenly, there are no words. And there’s nothing more crippling than holding the pain with no release and the weight with no words.

One of the only things that has brought me peace in this season is music. Sometimes, certain songs articulate the scope of my feelings in ways that I simply cannot – almost as if they return my words to me with the added affirmation that I am not alone. Someone, somewhere, has felt as I do. Someone, somewhere, has the heart and the spirit to remind me that I do not walk alone, and my pain is not mine alone. They give the gift of words where there are none.

In case you needed this today, let me be your someone, somewhere. Someone, somewhere, has felt as you do. You do not walk alone, and your pain is not yours alone.

I’m going to practice healing by writing responses to the songs and artists that are currently carrying me. The ones that have been witnesses to my grief, and have given me words when I had none to give. If you find any comfort and joy in following along, please join me. I hope these songs minister to you as much as they have to me. You can find the updated playlist on the YouTube channel here - Playlist: Songs for when there are no words.

I don’t have a title for this series yet. Maybe it doesn’t need one. We’ll have to wait and see.

🫶🏾